He Sang a Lullaby
by EmoMouse
Summary: Sasuke and OC fall for eachother but face they problems of life. Is better than this sounds.
1. Chapter 1

**Aishiteru**

**Preface**

I flopped down into my chair in Registration on Monday morning. It was cold and hard underneath me. Hear comes another day at this _wonderful _school I thought to myself quietly. School was the only place where I was free from all my problems but even then school was very difficult. I spent most of the time with my head down trying not to attract attention to myself. I screwed that one up big time when I started going out with Joey. Everyone seems to know now and it makes life so complicated but I have no regrets. I love Joey. She is my rock. She keeps me sane and stops me losing it completely. But it means I have to try harder to hide all my bruises. I know what he doing is wrong but I still don't want to run the risk of someone finding out yet.

As I sat quietly minding my own business I felt a sharp pain hit the back of my head. It felt like a maths textbook at credit level. I knew the feeling of most things that hit me in registration. As I rubbed the back of my teacher gave me a sympathetic look and picked up the book. He never said anything to me about it but often would slip me a small chocolate or a new book or something. I always just sat there thinking I would rather you did something about it.

After registration Joey met me to walk to our first class. We did that everyday. I really hated school but being with Joey made it so much easier. She knew when things got to much for me and just hugged me which would relieve some of my pain until I was alone and could deal with it myself. I was very careful around Joey, I didn't want her to see the bruises or the cuts and scares I had. It would hurt her if she saw it, she wasn't aware of what was going on in my life. I love her and all I want to do is protect her from all the hurt I go through every day.

As we walked to our first class she gently took my hand.

"Hannah, baby, are you ok?" She asked.

"Yeah, why?" I asked puzzled.

"You seem more quiet than usual."

How could I tell that I hadn't slept last night out of fear of being hit again. I had been hit about six over the course of the evening because he found out about my cutting and lost it completely. He hit me repeatedly all over my body. My back was almost black and I couldn't twist around in any direction as my chest was very sore. When Joey hugged me I had to stop myself from almost screaming in pain.

"Are you sure your ok" Joey asked again sounding really worried.

"Yes," I told her through very gritted teeth.

PE was our first class, I was so not ready for that. As I surprise the teacher wanted us to play dodge ball. It was just agony. every time I got hit in the chest or back I had to grit my teeth very tightly. Joey was looking very worried very time she saw a ball hit me. She must have thought something serious was wrong but I just smiled through a brave face so she didn't think to much about it. My knee was really swollen from where I was hit with a rolling pin and even through so much effort I couldn't stop myself from eventually limping. My teacher called me to the side to sit down.

By this point my chest felt like it was going to explode and my knee was throbbing more than anything.

"What's wrong Hannah?" My teacher asked a very worried look on her face.

"Nothing Miss," I told her with a very small smile.

"You are chalk white Hannah and clearly in a lot of pain."

"No really I am fine," I tried telling her again.

I tried to stand up but my knee completely collapsed on me this time and I knew I was in for a long day.

"Joey take Hannah at one side and I will get the other. We need to get her to the first aid room," the teacher barked.

They carried me very slowly and gently out of the hall. The force of them hurt my chest and back even more but I didn't want to draw attention to it. It took us five minutes to get there as I couldn't put weight onto my knee.

"What have you done to your knee?" Miss Baird asked again.

"I fell down the stairs last night but didn't want to make a fuss of it," I lied.

"Hannah you should have said something," Joey said almost in tears.

"I didn't want to make a fuss Joey it's nothing really," I said trying to comfort her.

The first aid teacher came in at that point and asked to see my knee. So I pulled my trouser leg feeling relief knowing that my knee was the only injury on that leg.

"No wonder you can't walk," she said sounding shocked. "You have dislocated your knee and it's still dislocated. It's a wonder you got this far."

I looked down at that point and saw my knee. I gasped at the sight of it. It was very swollen and all around it was a deep shade of blue, also my knee cap was twisted around the side.

"I will take her to the hospital if you call her parents," Miss Baird said.

"Sure that makes sense."

"Can I stay with Hannah?" Joey asked.

"Yeah it may keep her relaxed," Miss Baird said.

So with more help I was put into the front side of her car and we drove of to the hospital.

"That must have been a bit of a tumble you took," she said.

"Yeah I wasn't paying attention," I said letting more lies come out of my mouth.

It wasn't a long journey to the hospital and Joey and I waited in the car while Miss Baird got a wheelchair. It wasn't long after we got into the A & E before we got seen as I was in a lot of pain. A nurse came in first and gave me some pain relief and explained that a doctor would be here as soon as possible. When he eventually turned up he explained that I will need an x ray then they will place my kneecap back into place before doing another x ray to check if everything was all right after words. It took a long time and was very painful but eventually everything was better again. They put a brace around my knee and gave me crutches. I was also given painkillers and told to rest my knee as much as possible. When they had been fixing my knee up Miss Baird had gone to phone the school to see where my parents where.

"No one answered any of the calls to any of the numbers the school has so I am going to have to take you back to the school," she explained.

I just nodded knowing that my parents just didn't care.

It took so much effort to get back to car as my back was killing me but at least I could walk now. I had never been on crutches before and was a bit wobbly but I made to the car without a disaster. It took some help but I managed to get in it also. The disadvantage was the brace stopped me bending my knee at all and through the pain I could still couldn't walk on it. On our way back to school Miss Baird spoke again.

"Your year head has arranged for you to sit in his office until we can contact your parents to come and pick you up," she explained.

"Ok," I said looking down at my feet.

I was hoping that it wouldn't be him that picked me up. I had lied my way through it all but I bet he would us it as an excuse by saying I had told them what had really happened. So I just kept my head down until we got back to school. Why did this always happen to me I kept asking myself. We pulled up to the school and Miss Baird dropped me and Joey off at the door and left to park her car. We walked into the school but just before we reached the door Joey bent over and whispered into my ear.

"Roses are red, violets are blue, there's only one way to say this and that's I love you."

I had to turn away from her at that point to hide the tears that where forming in my eyes. No matter what happened I knew Joey would be there but at the same time I just really did not want her to get hurt. When we got into we sat down on the seats in reception and waited for Miss Baird to get back. When she did she took my straight up to my year heads office.

Joey was sent back to class and I was sat down in a seat with an other to hold my leg up.

"You can do whatever you like until we contact your parents," Mr Graham said.

"ok, sir," I replied given a weak smile.

I was fed up of all of this it was just getting to much wasn't there a way to make it stop. Well actually there was but it meant telling someone. I waited patently until Miss Baird left then spoke very quietly.

"Sir, could I speak to Miss Quinn?" I asked feeling my blood run cold.

"Sure," he said starting to look worried.

He disappeared and came back five minutes later with Miss Quinn right behind him. Miss Quinn was my Pupil Support teacher and I thought it may be easier to tell her as she is female. She came in the room and shut the door behind her.

"Hey Hannah, I've heard you've been in the wars," she said giving me a friendly smile. "Would you like it if Mr Graham stayed or do you want it to just be you and myself?"

"Could he leave?" I asked feeling slightly guilty.

"I will be in Mrs Grey's office," he explained. "Just come and get me when your finished.

So he picked up the work from his desk and left the room shutting the door quietly behind him.

"Hannah, what's going on?" She asked. "You have been very distant lately."

"I don't get on with my step-dad," I explained.

"Don't worry about that many people don't get on with there step-parents," she said trying to reassure me.

"No this is different," I said shaking my head. "He hates me, I can't do anything right. If I do wrong he hits me."

"Hannah are you saying he abuses you?" She asked turning white.

"Yes," I said then started crying.

"Did he have anything to do with your knee?"

"Yes."

"Hannah can you tell me what happened?" Miss Quinn asked looking scared.

"He found out that I have been cutting myself he lost his temper and through a rolling pin at me. It hit me in the knee but I couldn't show a reaction or he would just get worse," I explained tears falling freely down my face.

"Has he ever hurt you anywhere else?"

"Yes."

"Sorry Hannah but can you show me?" She asked sounding like she really didn't want to.

So I turned my back to her and showed her my back. I heard her gasp in real shock.

"Stay there Hannah I need to go and speak to Mr Graham and see what he says about this, but in my mind we need to get you out of there as soon as possible its really not safe."

So Miss Quinn left the room and I was left sitting there by myself still crying. I knew I was in fot it now and there was no going back.

About ten minutes after she left Miss Quinn came back with Mr Graham who looked even more worried than she did.

"Hannah, we are going to phone Social Services now, its safe to say you wont be going home tonight," he explained.

I just nodded and looked down at the ground again. It was obvious this was going to happen but it didn't stop it hurting any more than it already did. Miss Quinn came and sat next to me when Mr Graham went to make the phone call in a different room.

"It's ok Hannah, it will turn out ok in the end," she said trying her best to comfort me.

I couldn't look at her I just turned my face away so she wouldn't see the tears that where running down my face. I kept telling myself that I don't cry, that I am not allowed to show any emotion but I just couldn't help it. Everything inside me had built up over the past two years turned to tears and I couldn't stop them.

"You said he hurt your knee because he found out you had been cutting yourself," she asked tentivly.

I still couldn't speak so I just nodded my head. Luckily before she could ask anything else Mr Graham came back into the room.

"I have made the phonecall someone will be here before lunch to speak to you," he explained. "So all you have to do now is wait, is there anything you want?"

I shock my head and pulled my notepad and pen out my bag. I just sat there quietly and drew. After about an hour Mr Graham's phone went off making me jump almost a foot in the air because I had forgotten where I was. He looked up after he came off the phone and smiled.

"They are here," he explained. "I will go downstairs and get them and you can sit in here when you talk."

I nodded and waited patiently for them to come back up. As I sat there the lyrics of my favourite song went through my head.

_When your down and lost _

_And you need a helping hand _

_When your down and lost along the way_

_Just tell yourself _

_Ah I'll be ok_

I knew this day was going to change my life drastically.

**Chapter One**

The door opened again and a young women with short brown hair walked in accompanied by another man. He was a bit taller than her and had dark floppy hair. He couldn't have been any older than his late twenties.

"Hey Hannah," he said given me a smile. "My name is Adam and this is Sophie."

"Hey," I replied.

"You know why we are here don't you?" He asked.

"Yes, because of what I told Miss Quinn," I explained.

"That's right," he said. "Can you tell us what has been happening?"

I explained to them what had been going on. They asked questions through it and Sophie took notes through the whole thing. I felt sick when I told them about some of things that have been happening but I knew these where the right people to help.


	2. Chapter 2

**Chapter 2: The Truth Revelled**

**Zen's Point of view**

Monday dawned faster than expected. Before we knew it we were walking to school holding hands. I could feel Sasuke shaking next to me.

"It will be ok Sasuke-kun," I whispered softly.

He looked down at me and smiled. I felt my heart warm up at that. As we walked closer to the school I could feel his hand become clammy.

"Come on let's go straight to Mr Terry," I said guiding him.

"I don't think I can do this," he mumbled tears beginning to form in his eyes.

"Please Sasuke-kun do this for me," I said.

I knocked on the office door and held onto Sasuke to stop him legging it away.

"Come in," a voiced said sighing from the other side of the door.

We walked in and Mr Terry looked up at us raising his eyebrows.

"What do you want?" He asked in a stern voice.

"Sasuke needs to tell you something," I said standing my ground. "Go on Sasuke tell him what you told me."

"I don't know what to do," he said then burst into tears. "For a long time now I have been hearing a voice. I don't just hear him but I actually see him to. I don't know how to explain it. He intimidates me so much, that's why I hurt myself so much. It makes me feel like I have control over it but in reality I don't have any."

"Great," Mr Terry said with another sigh. "I will have to call your parents in and get you seen today by someone from CAMS."

"You can't phone my parents," Sasuke mumbled. "My dad kicked me out. He wants nothing to do with me because I am gay."

"You really are trying to give me a stressful day aren't you," Mr Terry muttered angrily. "I now have to get social services. Where on earth have you been staying!"

"He has been staying with me," I growled.

"Zen you have to leave," Mr Terry nearly shouted. "This is nothing to do with you. It's to do with Sasuke and is actually rather troublesome for me."

"You have no right to say that!" I shouted, finally lousing my temper. "He has done something really brave by asking for help today and all you do it act all stuck up. You shouldn't be a guidance teacher you're a waste of space and a stuck up prick!"

"GET OUT!" He roared at me. "Go up to Miss Fraser's office. I will phone her and tell what just happened."

I stormed out the office cursing and swearing under my breath. When I reached the stairs to go up to Miss Fraser's office anger took over my body and I slammed my knuckles into the wall repeatedly. I eventually stopped when the wall was covered in blood and my knuckles where gushing. I held my hand into my body and walked up the stairs. When I got to the office I knocked with my good hand and I was told to come in.

"Zen, can I get an explanation for your outrageous behaviour-," Miss Fraser started saying but she cut off when she saw my hand. "What did you do?"

"I lost my temper, the wall at the bottom of the stairs is a bit bloody," I muttered darkly.

"Come here," she said sighing.

I sat down on a chair and she gently placed a rowel over my hand to stop the bleeding. Then when it had stopped she removed the towel and looked at my hand.

"You need to go down to first aid and get that bandaged up," she explained. "Then come back up here. I need a word with you still."

I went back down the stairs to get my hand seen to. The first aider was already waiting for me when I got there still in a very bad mood.

"Hey Zen," she said. "Lets see your hand then."

I held my hand out for her to see.

"Nasty," she said. "You've shredded your poor knuckles. What did the wall ever do to you?"

I laughed starting to feel a little bit better. I let her bandage my hand and I spoke to her for a bit.

"Well I have to go now, sorry," I said. "Miss Fraser wants to talk to me."

**Sasuke's Point of view**

My blood turned cold when Zen left. I was alone with Mr Terry now.

"Right," he growled. "Sit down on that chair and don't move. I am going to have to make a few phone calls now."

I sat down and stared at the floor. I could here him pick up the phone and dial a number.

"Hello," he said. "My name is Martin Terry, I work at Konoha High School. I was wondering if you could send someone out to see one of my pupils today. He just disclosed to me about suffering from hallucinations but he thinks they are real. Also he has been a self harmer since he started at the school but we have been unable to prove it until now."

He stayed on the phone for another five minutes answering questions then came off. He dialled another number and started to speak again.

"Hello," he said again. "My name is Martin Terry, I work at Konoha High School and I was wondering of you could send out someone today. One of my pupils has no where to stay. Supposedly his father has told him to leave the family home on Friday. He stayed with his boyfriend over the weekend but we need to get somewhere permanent fro him to stay."

Once again he stayed on the phone another five minutes answering more questions.

When he eventually hung up he turned to look at me.

"Right, a social worker is coming over now to speak to you and someone from CAMS in coming this afternoon," he explained darkly.

I didn't respond to what he was saying I was to scared. He thought I was ignoring him and lost his temper.

"Stop being ungrateful you stupid little kid!" He shouted. "I've gone out my way to help you. I have enough work without you adding to it."

He came over to me ad I tensed away from him. He lost it completely then and his hand flew out and slapped me. Without thinking I jumped up and ran as fast as I could away from him.

I ran out the school and as far away from it as possible. I managed to get down the hill to the high street before I collapsed onto a bench. trying to catch my breath I began to think what I should do. Before I could get my head together a shadow fell over me. It was my father.

"You're meant to be in school," he growled grabbing my wrist.

I couldn't get out of his grasp. He dragged me back up to the school and physically pushed me into the office area, then he left me to my day. I just stood there in shock when I spotted Mr Terry walking to me looking very angry.

"Get back to my office," he growled. "The social worker is here and she needs to speak to you."

As he walked me back to his office I could feel myself turning paler. I was walking to my doom I just knew it. When I entered the room a young woman was sitting in one of the chairs writing in a notebook. She heard me enter and looked up with a friendly smile.

"Hey," she said very calmly. "You must be Sasuke. Nice to meet you, my name is Skye."

"Hello," I mumbled taking a seat in one of the other chairs.

"How are you?" She asked kindly.

"Fine," I mumbled again.

"You know why I am here don't you?"

"Yes," I said quietly. "You are going to find me somewhere to go as I don't have a home any more."

"Yes," she said. "But I also will need to speak to your parents and see if we can work this situation out. If not then we can place you in a children's home not far from here."

"Dad will never let me back in the house," I muttered. "According to him I am no son of his because I am gay."

Skye sighed deeply and wrote all this down in her notebook. Looks like she comes across this situation often. I kept my head down to try and hide the tears forming in my eyes.

"I here you are getting seen by someone from CAMS this afternoon. Can I ask what it is about?"

"I don't know to be honest."

"Ok then. But can I ask how you have those scares?"

I looked at the carpet and could feel myself blushing deeply. I wanted to tell her the truth but I couldn't bring myself to it after what Mr Terry had said.

"It's nothing," I eventually mumbled.

"Sasuke, I need an honest answer here," Skye said seriously. "Did you do it to yourself?"

**Zen's Point of view**

I sat down heavily when I got back to Miss Fraser's office. I couldn't control myself anymore, I began sob deep heaving sobs. Miss Fraser looked shocked at my reaction.

"Zen what's wrong?" She asked sounding shocked.

"It was six years ago today since my mum past away," I cried.

"Zen, I never knew," Miss Fraser said in a soft voice.

I pulled my knees up to my chest and put my head into them, but I continued to sob into my knees. Miss Fraser tried to comfort me but eventually gave up when she was getting no further. I still wouldn't look up but I heard her go over to the computer and type for a little bit. Then she picked up the phone and dialled a number.

"Hello Mr Philps, it's Miss Fraser Zen's year head here," I heard her say. "I am sorry to disturb you but could you come in and get Zen please. He is rather upset and I can't seem to get through to him."

She spoke for another few minutes then hung up.

She moved back across the room and sat next to me again.

"Zen your dad is coming in to get you. I know you are hurting a lot right now but I feel that maybe you need to see someone about this. It may have been six years now but it's obviously still hurting you badly," she said softly.

I couldn't react to that I just stayed curled up crying.

"Zen, how are you feeling right now?" Miss Fraser asked sounding very worried.

"I feel…" I tried to say. "I feel like I want this to end. I want the pain to stop. I feel empty. Sasuke helped. I love him, he loved me back but now he is gone as well. Everyone I love is taking away from me."

With out thinking I brought my unbandaged hand up to my mouth and bit deep into it. I didn't know what I was doing but I wanted the pain to make me feel alive. When Miss Fraser clocked on to what was happening she grabbed my hands away from me.

"Don't Zen you will only make it worse doing that," she said sternly still holding my hands away from me. "I am going to let go of your hands now and go next door to get another teacher. You promise me you won't do anything."

I just sat there head on my knees with no emotion showing.

She stood up quickly and left the room. Within minutes she was back with another year head, Mr Anderson, who sat next to me while she went down to the office to meet my dad.

"So Zen," Mr Anderson said softly. "I hear you're having a bit of a tuff time."

I didn't respond so he gave up and just watched me to make sure I wouldn't hurt myself.

I heard footsteps coming along the corroder, then I heard my dad speak but still I didn't move.

"Hey Zen," he said gently. "Not feeling to good are you? I know exactly what you feel, but it will stop soon. How about you come home with me and we have pizza and talk about this."

Still I wouldn't move.

"Mr Philps if you don't mind me suggesting maybe you should take him up to casualty. They can get a team down to access him and try and get him help," Miss Fraser suggested gently to my dad.

"Yes," he said. "I think we may have to do that. Can you just give this to Sasuke for me. Its both my mobile number and Zen's so he can stay in touch. I think Zen may be off a few days. Tell him to phone so we can sort him picking up his stuff because I will be with Zen until this sorted. Thank you."

All I felt was dad gently pick me up into his arms. He carried me, while I was still curled up in a ball, down the stairs and placed me into the front seat of the car. He put my seat belt on before climbing into the drivers seat and starting the car.

"It's ok Zen," he said. "We are out the school now. You can cry if you want to. I know you are holding it all back."

Those words finally broke the barrier that was holding back six years worth of pain and hurt. Once I started to cry I couldn't stop myself. The tears kept coming. Dad kept quiet as I sat there, still curled up, crying.

"I know how you feel son," he whispered barely audible. "There are days when I want to lock myself away in bed and cry. But I know if I start I will never stop. I need to be strong fro you. I promised your mum I would always be here for you through the good and the bad and I promise you now that I will be. I may have lost her but I still have you. I am proud to call you my son Zen. Even when things have been really hard you've been strong but now its time we got you the help you needed because no one should feel this pain."

**Sasuke's Point of view**

I sat there in silence after she asked me that. I knew I had to answer the question but I was scared at what they were going to do with if I told them the truth.

"Sasuke," Skye said softly. "Please can you answer the question."

"Yes," I mumbled quietly.

"How long?" She asked me.

"Seven years," I mumbled.

She gasped when I said it. I could feel myself drawing back from her scared. I didn't want to be judged for this. It wasn't me, I only did it because of Orochimaru but now I can't seem to stop.

"Can I see your arms?" Skye asked.

So I slowly undid the bottoms on the sleeves of my shirt. After hesitating I pulled my shirt sleeves up. One arm was still bandaged where I had my stitches but the other wasn't leaving me scares on show. Skye gently took my arm to look at it a bit better.

"We will see what the CAMS team say this afternoon," she said gently. "Then we will take it from there."

I nodded and quickly covered my arms again feeling self conscious. Skye explained that if it all went well with CAMS this afternoon then I would go into a Children's home. Then she said that she would stay with me while I was interviewed by CAMS.

There was a knock at the door and Mr Terry stuck his head round it.

"Everything ok?" He asked. "They are here."

"Ok," Skye said with a gentle smile.

Mr Terry moved and a man and women came into the room.

"Hey, it's Sasuke isn't it?" The guy asked. "I'm Dr Iruka, a child psychiatrist."

"Ok," I mumbled.

They both sat down and the women introduced herself as Anne, she said she was a psychologist I just sat there silently staring at the floor. So they started asking questions. It started of with stuff like where did I live before I moved to Scotland. But then they started to ask how long had I been self harming, that was followed by questions about Orochimaru. Well they didn't call him by his name as they didn't know it. I answered the best I could to all the questions but a few times I broke down in tears.

After they had finished asking all the stuff Dr Iruka spoke.

"Sasuke, you are going to have to go into hospital," he said gently. "By the sound of all this you are schizophrenic and we need to get you on medication as soon as possible to control this. When you get out it's up to Skye here where you will stay. But right now your health is the most important matter. You stay here with Skye and I will go and make a few phone calls before Skye takes you up to the hospital."

He said and I just burst into tears. There was another knock at the door though, It was Miss Fraser this time.

"Sorry to interrupt but I just need to give this to Sasuke, it's from Zen," she explained and handed me a piece of paper.

I took it and out it in my pocket. Skye gently out her hand on my arm causing me to jump at her touch.

"Who is Zen?" She asked.

"My boyfriend. His dad was letting me stay there because I had no where to go," I explained quietly.

Skye smiled at me then left me to think a bit while she made a quick phone call.

Dr Iruka came back into the room and smiled.

"We have got you a bed in a Adolescent Psychiatric Ward. It's up at the hospital so Skye will take you up," he explained. "I will see you tomorrow."

So I stood up and followed Skye to her car. She got into the drivers seat and I sat quietly next to her. When the car started I put my head in my hands. I missed Zen. When would be the next time I saw him. We didn't even get to say a proper goodbye. We were just split up. Stupid Mr Terry really got to him. Today was going to be a difficult day for him any way as it was the anniversary of his mums death. It's a shame he lost her like that. When they found out she had the brain tumour it was already to late. That left her only six months. Zen was only nine at the time. That is to young to lose your mum. Well any age is to young to lose someone. I lost my brother when I was seven. He was nineteen at the time. He committed suicide.

**Zen's Point of view**

When we got to the hospital I was still curled up refusing to talk so dad just picked me up again and carried me into casualty. He went over to the reception and spoke.

"Hey," he said. "My son needs to see someone if that's ok. He has had a kinda mental breakdown."

"Name and details please," the receptionist asked in a brisk voice.

After my dad told her all my details we were told to take a seat. Dad sat down but kept hold of me curled up, so I ended up sitting on his knee.

It wasn't long before my name was called and dad carried me through. I was placed down on a bed and dad stepped away from me. I heard footsteps come in and a male voice spoke.

"Hey Zen, I am a child psychiatrist," he said very gently. "I want to help you but you need to speak to me. If you don't speak we will have to put you in hospital because from what your teacher was saying your suicidal and we need to keep you safe."

I could hear my dad gasp when the doctor said that but I couldn't bring myself out of this ball. I

felt so safe like this, it's like nothing can touch me

"Mr Philps," I heard the doctor say. "I am going to run upstairs and check we have a bed because I am aware another patient is arriving soon and I'm not sure if there is still one more bed, please bear with me. I feel that Zen should come in. Even if it's only a few days it may give him a rest and we can help him the most right now."

The doctor left the room closing the door softly. Dad came back over and peeled my hand away from my body. He held my hand tight in his.

"Zen," he said gently. "I will come in later with your stuff. Do you want your elephant? The one your mum made for you when you were little?"

I made my first movement since this morning and nodded my head. I could hear my dad begin to cry so I squeezed his hand to show I still care about him.

The doctor came back soon after and said there was one bed left and could dad take me up. Dad said quickly he would go home and get me some stuff and then come back in with it. I felt him gently me pick me back up and he carried quite a long time. Eventually I felt him out me back down on a bed.

"I will be back later Zen," he said then left

"Zen," the doctor said gently sitting down on the end of my bed. "My name is Dr Iruka. I am going to be in charge of you. There is another boy who will be in this room with you but at the moment he is getting some lunch. Would you like something?"

I didn't respond to anything so he tried another angle.

"Ok, you don't have to talk but can we get you out that ball. Even for a few minutes?" He asked gently.

I slowly lifted my head out and looked up at him. He was wearing black trouser and a blue shirt, his hair was brown and tied up at the back in a spiky ponytail, his eyes were also a dark brown and he had a very friendly smile.

"See it's not that bad is it?" he asked giving me smile.

I shook my head and sat up on the bed leaning against the wall. The room was a pale blue and there were to white wardrobes, two white beds and a bathroom at the bottom of the room.

There was a knock at the door and a nurse stuck her head round.

"Sorry doctor you are needed," she said quickly. "Alex is kicking off again and we need your help."

Dr Iruka jumped up, quickly apologised and ran out the room after the nurse. I was left alone. I leant back against the wall and brought my knees back up to my chest, I rested my chin on top of them and slowly took in my surroundings. Why was I here? I'm not crazy, am I? I was distracted all of a sudden by someone entering the room. When he saw me he stopped dead. When I saw him I couldn't believe it. It was Sasuke!

"Zen," he said in his quiet voice. "What are you doing here?"

"They say I am meant to be having a rest because I won't speak to anyone," I mumbled. "Why are you here?"

"I told them about Orochimaru remember and Dr Iruka my psychiatrist said that I am schizophrenic and they are putting me on tablets."

I nodded in response because I still wasn't up to really talking. Sasuke come over and sat next to me. He gently snaked his hand around my back and sat holding me close to him. I just put my head on his shoulder and cried softly into it.

"It'll be ok Zen-chan," he whispered in my ear.

**Sasuke's Point of view**

It hurt me so much to see Zen in that state. He obviously was still hurting really badly about his mothers death.

"Sasuke-kun," Zen whispered. "I love you."

"I love you too," I said to him.

There was a knock at the door so I stood up and walked over to my own bed. A smiley nurse came into the room with a chair and sat down.

"Sorry boys but I have to stay here," she explained. "As Zen is in for being suicidal he has to have someone with him at all times."

Zen sank down in his bed and refused to make eye contact with me. How was I meant to talk to him now? I smiled at the nurse and sat on my own bed. Another nurse came into the room with some tablets.

"Hello Sasuke," she said. "Can you take these please."

She handed me two tablets and water. I took them like I was told and lay back on my bed.

The nurse left and Dr Iruka came in.

"Hey boys," he said. "Sasuke can I have a word alone please."

I followed him into another room.

"You took those tablets there didn't you?" He asked .

"Yes," I said. "How long will I be in here?"

"Only a few days if these tablets are ok," he explained. "Oh you said you had a boyfriend called Zen. By any chance is it the same Zen that is sharing the room with you."

"Yes," I mumbled feeling myself starting to blush.

"That's great!" He said really cheerfully. "Can you try and get him to talk to you please, if he starts speaking he can also leave in a few days along with you."

"We have already spoke a little," I said quietly.

Dr Iruka nodded and stood up indicating that I should go back to my room. I did so and he followed.

When we entered the room again Zen looked up and gave me a small smile. Dr Iruka went over to Zen and spoke to him quietly.

"Zen, I think you might be depressed brought on my the lose of your mum," he explained in a low voice. "I want to put you on some tablets and if they are ok you can go home in a few days and things will go back to normal. Is that ok?"

"Yes," Zen mumbled very quietly.

"That's a boy," Dr Iruka said. "Your not going to try and kill yourself are you?"

"No," Zen said sounding stronger. "I would never hurt Sasuke like that."

Dr Iruka smiled. He then told the nurse that Zen was fine to be left with me. I smiled at Zen to reassure him the best I could. He smiled back starting to look a bit more himself. Dr Iruka left with the nurse.

I went over to Zen and pulled him off the bed into a hug. He hugged me back. I looked down at him and kissed him deeply. He kissed me back leaning into me.

We pulled apart when there was a knock on the door. Zen's dad walked in carrying both my stuff and Zen's .

"Skye phoned me and told me you were here Sasuke so I thought I would deliver it personally. Also when you get out you will be staying with me. We are getting it sorted so that you can. Guess what Zen that means we will get you a double bed and another wardrobe so that Sasuke has somewhere to put his things."

Zen's face lit up like it was Christmas and I couldn't help myself but laugh.

"Thank you Mr Philps," I said.

"Hey non of the Mr Philps," Zen's dad said laughing. "You can call me Dave."

I smiled gratefully. He dropped our stuff on our beds then said he had to go. Zen got up and gave him a hug, I smiled and said goodbye.

When he had left Zen turned to face me.

"At least things are going to work out," he said softly.

"Yeah," I said. "I have you now, my life is made."

Zen walked over to my bed and lay with his head on my knee while I stroked his hair softly. I could see him beginning to nod off to sleep. I knew he must be really tired as he never slept the night before so I let him fall asleep. When he was out of it I slipped out from underneath his head and placed a pillow there instead. Then I set about putting our stuff away quietly so not to wake Zen up. He looked so peaceful sleeping there.

**Zen's Point of view **

I eventually woke up when Sasuke gave me a little nudge.

"Hey Zen-chan," he said gently . "You're going to have to get up now it's tea time."

"Not chan," I mumbled still half asleep. "It's Zen-kun."

Sasuke just laughed and dragged me out the bed. I staggered a bit to begin with but then I followed him out the room. We went into a big living area where lots of other teenagers sat around tables. I took a seat next to Sasuke where two girls and another boy sat. The boy had very red messy hair, his eyes were outlined in dark eyeliner and he had drew love in kanji on his forehead. One girl had bright pink hair and a very warm smile, she seemed to be eyeing up Sasuke. The girl next to her had long blond hair and a scowl on her face. The boy also looked in a very bad mood.

"I'm Sakura," the pink haired girl said introducing herself. "This is Sammy and Alex."

I looked up at Alex remembering his name from earlier, but I thought it was wise to say nothing about it.

"Sakura?" Sasuke asked sounding interested at her name. "That means Cherry Blossom. Are your family Japanese? My name is Sasuke and this is Zen."

"Yes my dad is Japanese," Sakura said with a sweet smile.

It was turning out to look like Sakura had a thing for _my _Sasuke. Sasuke just nodded in return then turned his attention to the food being placed in front of him. It was chicken in gravy with mashed potato. I picked my fork and prodded the chicken a little.

"Zen, it's not alive you know," a nurse said briskly as she walked past. "You're meant to eat it."

Sasuke burst out laughing next to me so I prodded him in the leg under the table.

"Sorry Zen-chan," he said still laughing.

When he said that it caused Sakura to look up in confusion.

"Sasuke, I'm sorry but don't you mean Zen-kun?" She asked.

"No," he said. "I call him Zen-chan."

"Shut up Sasuke," I said starting to turn red.

Sakura was still frowning, she couldn't figure it out. Alex looked up at me and spoke for the first time.

"Are you gay?" He asked bluntly.

"Alex," a nurse said sternly. "Don't be rude. Just eat your dinner."

I looked at Sasuke and he looked back at. We just burst out laughing. I turned to Alex and nodded so that he got answer to his question. He looked at me with a scowl for another minute then his expression softened and he actually smiled.

Poor Sakura's mouth was on the floor by now.

"So, Zen why are you here?" Alex asked.

"I'm depressed," I muttered staring at my dinner.

"And you Sasuke?" Alex asked turning to Sasuke.

"I'm schizophrenic," Sasuke said. "Why are you here?"

"I'm a manic depressive," Alex said proudly.

"My brother was manic depressive," Sasuke said.

I looked up at him shocked. He had never told me he had a brother and what did he been by his brother _had _manic depression.

"That's weird," Alex said. "I have been here five years and no one else has had it."

"No he was in here, but he killed himself eight years ago," Sasuke mumbled.

After that I couldn't take anymore of the conversation. I slammed my fork down onto my plate and stormed out the room. I through myself down onto my bed and cuddled into my elephant beginning to cry. Minutes later there was a knock at the door and someone came into the room. They sat down gently into the end of my bed and placed there hand on my shoulder.

"Zen," a male voice said. He must have been one of the nurses. "Are you ok?"

"No," I mumbled still crying.

"What's wrong?" He asked softly.

I just shock my head and curled up into a ball. He removed his hand from my shoulder and left the room. About five minutes later someone else came into the room.

"Hey Zen," Dr Iruka said gently. "Is it ok if I give you something to help you sleep. Maybe you will feel better in the morning." I felt a pain in my arm then gently fell asleep.

**Sasuke's Point of view**

I sat in shock after Zen stormed out and I went to follow him.

"Sit back down Sasuke," one of the nurses said. "There is nothing you can do for him right now."

I sat back down but couldn't finish my tea. I felt so guilty. I should never have told him about Itachi like that. He was just starting to pick up a bit and I went and blew it.

"You ok?" Sakura asked.

I just nodded in response.

When tea was finally over I went to go to back to the room but a nurse pulled me aside.

"Dr Iruka is with Zen give him five minutes. He just gave him something to help him sleep, he was to distressed. He is going to sit with him another five minute while he just makes sure he is asleep. Go and knock on the door quietly and see if you can go in yet. I think he also wants to see you."

I did as I was told and went down to the room and quietly knocked on the door.

"Come in Sasuke," Dr Iruka said. "He is asleep now. I need to speak to you too. Would you be ok with taking a tablet to help you sleep tonight?"

"Ok," I mumbled. "I will take it but first can I get put over Zen?"

Dr Iruka left then came back in with a blanket and my tablet. I gently put the blanket over Zen and tucked him in carefully. I then put his elephant nest to him under the blanket. After that I went over to Dr Iruka and swallowed the tablet he gave me.

"That's a boy Sasuke," he said. "Off to bed now."

He left the room and I quickly changed into some pyjamas. Then I crawled under my covers and fell into a deep sleep.

I woke up the next morning when I heard Zen get up. He looked a bit crumpled but he smiled when he saw me.

"Sasuke-kun," he said fondly.

"Zen-chan," I replied with a smile.

"Shower?" he asked.

I jumped out of bed at his offer causing him to smile. He grabbed some clean clothes and I did the same, then followed him into the bathroom. I undressed while he quickly used the toilet then he got the shower ready while I took my turn using the toilet. When it was warm enough he stepped into it and I followed suit. He kept his back to me while the water gushed over us. So I placed my arms around him placing them on his chest.

"Sasuke," he said very quietly. "You're digging into my back."

I felt myself blush deeply but I slid my hands further down his body. His body immediately reacted to my touch.

"You ready for this?" I mumbled into his ear.

"Just do it," he said his breathing becoming heavy.

I adjusted myself behind him then pushed. He gasped to begin with but soon began to moan at the feeling. I moved my hips into him and then out again. He felt so good. Whilst I was doing this I kept my hand moving at the front of his body. I don't know if it was just doing this with Zen or the added heat from the water but I didn't last long, Zen didn't either.

After words we stood leaning against each other panting a little.

"You ok?" I asked Zen softly.

"Yes," he mumbled. "My knees still feel weak from that."

"Don't worry it will pass in a minute," I said reassuring him. "Then we can get dressed."

We both stepped out the shower grabbing a towel each. After getting dried and dressed we went back into our bedroom. Zen sprawled across his bed.

"You ok?" I asked again.

"Yes Sasuke-kun, I said I'm fine stop worrying," he said sounding almost his normal self again.

"That's good Zen-chan," I said fondly. "I love you, I've just been worried about you."

"I know, but I'm ok now," he said. "Hey let's go see about breakfast. I'm starving."

I laughed and stood up. Zen followed me. We went along to the living area. Breakfast didn't seem to be ready yet so we went and sat with Alex.

"Hey," he said. "How you feeling Zen?"

"Better thanks," Zen said smiling."

**Zen's Point of view**

I like Alex. Everyone seemed kind of weary off him but he seemed an alright person.

"Did you sleep ok?" Alex asked.

"Yes," I said with a smile

Sasuke gently took my hand and squeezed it. Alex noticed and gave us a soft smile.

"You two are lucky," he said quietly. "You've met the love of your life. You can leave here happy."

"You will be able to leave here soon," I said. "You're a good person. I admit I was scared first time I met you but once I got to know you I really liked you."

Alex smiled slightly again. Sasuke looked at him. Then did something that shocked all of us. He picked up Alex's hand and squeezed it, like he had done with mine.

"You'll get better," he said. "You will make it through this because you're strong."

As he said that Dr Iruka walked past and stopped. He turned around and sat down with use.

"They're right you know Alex," Dr Iruka said in his cheery voice. "With a bit of work you can get out of here in a month."

We were called over for breakfast about ten minutes after that deep talk. Sitting down with our cereal Sakura joined us. She began talking to Alex as normal but completely blanked me and Sasuke. I was sitting pushing my food about the bowl and Sasuke was digging in like he hadn't been fed in a week. When he finished he started eyeing mine up so we swapped bowls when no one was looking. I stood up to return my bowl to counter and then landed straight on my face. Looking up with confusing I felt blood pouring out my nose but all I was aware of was the pain in my knee. Then all of a sudden I heard Sasuke completely lose his temper.

"You!" He roared. "You tripped him up on purpose."

There were footsteps and then Sasuke was getting calmed down. Another nurse came over to me to try and help.

"Hey Zen," he said. "Put this to your nose while I get someone to help me get you up."

I put my head back, pinched my nose and held the tissue under it. My knee was killing my but I couldn't see it because of my trousers. When the nurse returned with another nurse the help my under my arms and pulled me up. When I tried to put weight on my knee though it was to much and I screamed in pain.

I was half carried back to my room where I was placed down on a bed. My trousers where cut up the side and I got the first look at my knee. I was shocked. My kneecap had twisted to the side. Just then Dr Iruka came into the room with Sasuke. Sasuke let out a loud gasp of shock when he saw my leg.

"Ok, it's safe to say you've dislocated your knee," Dr Iruka said. "I am going to put it back in place which will hurt a lot. Then we will get you in a wheelchair and down to casualty where they will put a brace on your knee. Then we can get you back up here for your therapy session."

Before I could argue he twisted my knee and it was agony. I had tears streaming down my face and poor Sasuke was left sitting on his bed looking pale.

"Right we are going to get you down there now Zen," Dr Iruka explained. "Sasuke can you go to your therapy session with Anne."

In casualty I had a brace placed around my knee and was giving crutches. Then was also told I would be referred for more tests on my knee to see how much damage was done. So after all that I slowly walked back up to the ward. When I got there I realised World War Three had broken out. From what I could here Sasuke had tried to attack Sakura over what had happened this morning. Sasuke had been banished to his room and Sakura was a big trouble over what she had done to me. I was told to go to my room and I would be called on later. When I got to the room Sasuke was sitting on bed with blood on his knuckles.

"Sasuke-Kun," I said wearily. "What did you do to your hands?"

"I hit the wall," he whispered indicating the bloody dents in to wall behind him.

"That wasn't bright Sasuke," I said sitting down next to him and dropping my crutches on the floor. "Come here."

Pulling Sasuke closer to me he put his head onto my knee and let the tears fall. I put my head back against the wall and rested my hand on his shoulder.

We were woken up by a nurse coming into the room.

"Hello boys," she said. "Dr Iruka will be along in five minutes."

I gingerly moved onto my own bed and waited for Dr Iruka to arrive.

**Sasuke's Point of view**

I sat up and tried to wipe my knuckles as best as possible. A few minutes later there was a knock at the door and Dr Iruka came in. He sat down on Zen's bed and smiled.

"Hey boys," he said. "Sasuke what did you do to the poor wall?"

"Nothing," I mumbled looking down at the floor.

"Let me see your knuckles then," Dr Iruka said walking over to me

I held out my hands, he sighed deeply. He left the room and returned with two bandages. He wrapped them around my hands which gave me the look of a boxer.

"I've spoken to Sakura," he said. "What happened today won't happen again. I'm sorry Zen that it happened. Now Sasuke you have a therapy session with Anna."

I stood up, kissed Zen softly on the lips and left the room. I could hear Dr Iruka talking to Zen as I shut the door.

I went down the hall to the therapy room and knocked. Anna asked me to enter. I walked in and she indicated for me to sit down. So I sat down quietly in a chair opposite her.

"Hello Sasuke," she said. "How are you?"

"Ok thanks," I mumbled looking down at the floor.

"I heard there has been some conflict about your relationship. How has that effected you?"

"I have been with it," I half growled. "It's been effecting Zen more."

"Ok I see," Anna said trying to be understanding "There is someone I want to introduce you to. There is a nurse on this ward he like yourself is Japanese, he has struggled with self harm and is also homosexual. With all that he has come out the other side in once piece and has achieved his dream to help others who self harm."

Just then there was another knock at the door and a nurse I recognised walked in. He had a indescribable shade of hair that stuck up at all angles identical to a scarecrow. He smiled cheerfully at me and sat down.

"Hello Sasuke," he said. "My names Kakashi."

I couldn't stop myself but I burst out laughing when he told me that. Anne looked shocked but Kakashi also laughed.

"Yes I can see why you laugh at my name," he said still chuckling. "Sorry Anne I may not have explained this to you. All Japanese names have an English meaning to them, for example Sasuke mean warrior and Sakura means Cherry Blossom. On the other hand there are some unusual meaning, an other example is that my name means scarecrow and Dr Iruka is Dolphin."

"I can see why Sasuke laughed," she said smiling.

We all chatted for a few more minutes about Japanese culture but then Kakashi looked at me again.

"So I here you have been struggling with self harm," he said calmly.

I nodded my head whilst sub consciously pulling my sleeves down.

"Take your jumper off," he said calmly again. "I want to see you in a t-shirt."

"No," I mumbled.

"Sasuke, take your jumper off," he repeated more firmly. "I know it makes you feel self conscious but your going to have to face up to it. Look at my arms, they are a state but I have learnt to accept them and move on."

So I reluctantly pulled my hooded jumper off and placed it next to me. I could sense both Anna and Kakashi inspecting my arms.

"Do you have stitches?" Kakashi asked.

"Yes," I mumbled feebly.

"Can I take the bandage off and look at them?" He asked gently

I nodded to he pulled his chair closer and gently started unwrapping the bandage. Once it was undone he put it in the pin and looked at my wrist.

"Looks nasty," he said. "How did you do it?"

"Cut myself at school last Thursday," I mumbled.

"Ok," he said. "I need to get another dressing to recover that."

When he left Anne turned to me.

"So would you like therapy sessions with him instead of me?" She asked.

"Yes," I said quietly.

When Kakashi returned he redressed my arm and sat back down again.


End file.
